Reconcile

Coming home in the early afternoon, Joseph hangs his coat on the rack beside the door. Looking around at the seemingly empty home, he sighs quietly and heads to the kitchen. He was hoping to catch his brother Caleb when he came home, but he was probably in his room again. This past week, he’d started noticing the teen avoiding him. He had no idea what he did to cause it, but he was determined to find out. For now though, he resigned himself to cooking lunch for the two of them. He had a feeling that the boy hadn’t made himself anything yet, and neither of them were the type to just make sandwiches on a winter day like this.

Ever since he’d started college, his mom began to worry about his younger brother. With the lack of time on his hands, Joseph barely had any time to leave his dorm to come visit, or to even call to check in at times. With that in mind, he decided to take some of his classes online instead. With a more flexible schedule, he’d been making an effort to come home once a week to spend time with them both. It hasn’t seemed to do much, though. Caleb didn’t spend much time with them nowadays. He was either in his room or out all day, coming home in time for dinner but not for much else before he was off to bed soon after. Anytime they asked if something was going on, he avoided the question and brushed them off. Their mother had long since stopped asking, instead just letting him know that she’ll be there when he’s ready. While Joseph understood why…he didn’t want to give up just yet. He cared a lot about his brother; he changed up his whole schedule just to be there for him, after all. If something was wrong, he was going to get to the bottom of it. Granted, those efforts hadn’t come to much yet, but he wasn’t going to give up.

Finishing up their lunch, which was a simple veggie stew, Joseph takes out their serving tray and gets to work. The way to a sibling’s heart is a nice meal, or at least that’s what works on Caleb. He wants to make this as special as he can, even if adding one of the flowers from the vase at the window is a bit overkill. After finishing the display with a plate of toasted bread and a glass of juice, he makes his way upstairs, careful not to spill anything on anything else. He knocks on the door a few times, listening for any sort of response. As usual, though, he didn’t get one. He sighs, but doesn’t let this get to him. Setting the top that came with the bowl on top of it, he pulls out a notepad and starts writing. He’d been doing this for a while now. Whenever he couldn’t get a hold of Caleb, he’d slide a note under the door. Letting him know when it was time to eat, asking if he needed anything, or just letting him know he’s home if he’d like to talk, it’d end up on a note under the door. Sliding today’s note into the room, he sets the tray on a side table in the hall. He’ll catch him when the dishes need cleaning hopefully. Heading for the stairs, he pauses. From the bathroom he hears something hitting the floor with a clack. Curious, he ventures over to the end of the hall. He knocks but doesn’t get a response here either. Or, well, not a verbal one. He hears more things hitting and rolling across the tiles. 

“Uh…Caleb? You alright in there?” He cracks the door open, peeking in to see his brother on the floor. He’s holding several bottles of foundation and concealer and doing his best to avoid facing his older brother. Not sure what else to do, Joseph walks up and crouches behind him. He notices now that Caleb is shaking. He places a hand on his back, doing his best to keep his tone even. “Sorry, did I scare you? Are you hurt?” The teen shakes his head, though he still won’t face his brother. 

“I…I’m fine, I’m fine.” Caleb reaches up to the counter, putting the bottles onto it. “I didn’t think you’d be back so soon…” Standing up now, only a glimpse of his face seen in the mirror before being covered by a towel. “Why’d you just come in here anyway? You didn’t even knock.” The strain in his voice was clearer now, making his brother come closer. 

“I heard things falling in here, I was worried about y-”

 “Well I’m fine! Just go already!” Cutting his brother off, Caleb’s raised voice sounded more panicked than anything. He tries to push his way to the door, but Joseph quickly grabs his arm. 

“Caleb.” A pause. “Please, tell me what’s going on.” Another, longer pause. With a deep breath, Joseph continues. “Why are you hiding your face?” 

“I’m not, I just…” Caleb pulls his hand away, backing up. “Just…leave me alone! Why do you even care?!” Joseph answers almost immediately. 

“Because I’m your brother!” He places a hand on Caleb’s shoulder, easing his voice. “I didn’t change up my whole schedule just to end up leaving you alone. I care about you, Caleb. I want to help you.” 

The teen steps back again, a quiver prominent in his voice. “I’m perfectly fine! I don’t know what you’re trying to get by bothering me so damn much!”

“Caleb, I’ve known you your whole life. I know how you act when you’re quote unquote fine.” Joseph reaches forward, grabbing his brother’s hand. “Please, tell me what’s wrong. I don’t want to let you deal with whatever this is alone.”

Caleb is quiet now, racking his brain for whether he should admit it. Eventually, he lowers his hand, taking the towel with it. His face was covered in makeup, though it was quite smudged now. He didn’t meet his brother’s eyes, instead choosing to look down at the messy towel. “There. Go ahead and laugh or freak out or whatever…” With his head down, he doesn’t notice the soft smile on his brother’s face.

“You were practicing, Cal. I wouldn’t get on your case over that.”

Looking up in confusion over the statement, he gets a rag to the face. Joseph takes his time cleaning the foundation and lipstick off, Caleb finally speaking up when he goes to wash the makeup off of the cloth. “You’re…cool with this?”

Chuckling, Joseph turns to his brother again, cleaning the rest of the makeup off. “The only thing I’m not cool with is the shade you used. You’re way too pale for it.” Placing the rag on the sink, he comes back to his brother. “How about I help you pick a new foundation? I think that you’ll have way more fun with the right stuff.” 

It takes Caleb a moment to register this, all of this. As soon as he does though, he pulls his older brother into a tight hug. “I…I’m sorry. For hiding this, and yelling at you. I was just scared. I didn’t know what you’d say or how mom would react.” The relief washing over him brings with it tears, which try as he might, started to trickle faster than he could wipe them. “I don’t…don’t know why I’m like this, even. Putting on makeup like some weirdo…”

At that, Joseph pulls him into another hug, somehow tighter than the one before. “Hey, you’re not some weirdo. You’re doing something you enjoy, and no one worth your time would judge you for that. Especially not mom.” He brings the rag over once more, helping to wipe the tears away. “I think she’d even be impressed! The towel messed it up, but I could tell you put a lot of work into it.”

Caleb smiles, a genuine smile Joseph hadn’t seen in a few months. “Thanks, Joseph.” He wipes the last of his tears away, looking at his brother properly. “I’m kinda glad you were so nosy. I think I would’ve taken this to the grave otherwise.” Tears start to well up once more, but he manages to hold them back. Instead, he starts to put his makeup together and into a small carrying case. When he reaches his foundation, he flips it, looking at the price tag on the bottom. “I’ll take you up on that offer, by the way. I kinda…bought this in a rush yesterday anyway, so if it’s not gonna work anyway I’d like my money back.”

Joseph looks at the label as well now, eyes widening. Thirty-nine dollars spent on the wrong shade. “…Caleb, did you get this for the design or something?”
“…maybe.”

“Okay, now I’m judging you.” Leading the way out of the bathroom now, Joseph heads back to the tray he’d left on the table. “Come on, let’s eat. I’ll take you back to the mall when we’re done.” Handing his brother the tray, he laughs at the growl Caleb’s stomach gives in response. Heading downstairs, the two eat at the dining table together, spending it catching up properly and excitedly planning their list for their shopping trip later.